I watch a lot of movies. In most of them there is a series of events which culminate in a self realization which is preceded by a tragedy, or a test of moral fiber. Most times our lead character is triumphant in the end. Everything is tied up nice and neat and the people smile and ride off into the sunset. We see these movies and assume that all of this is just a fairy tale and none of this can happen to us in reality. Maybe this is true or maybe not. OR maybe we spend our lives trying to avoid the tragedy or the self realization or the conflict that allows us to have our aha moment.
One of my favourite plot lines is when the 'workaholic' dad or mom spends so much time at work they never see their kids. They don't know what is going on with their lives and have completely lost touch with their family. They spend every waking moment doing what the boss wants to 'get ahead' in the corporate world. Until that one fateful day when he misses a deadline and the boss fires him without a second thought. It's in that moment he realizes the 'value' he held at the company verses the value he has at home. He delivers a rather colourful monologue to his boss and goes home to play ball with his kids.
Sometimes OUR moments are not that extreme. Maybe it's the school play we missed every year because we work long hours. Maybe it's the meals that are eaten on the road because it's the only time we have. Or maybe it's the homework that doesn't get done because we don't have time to help. These are all moments that have consequences. We disappoint our children, our loved ones, our family and OURSELVES. These are the moments that should help us realize what is important in our lives.
I have heard the new generation referred to as self-entitled. They walk out of school and expect to be making the same money as the rest of us poor schleps without putting in the hours. That may be so but there is one thing they do have right. When the clock strikes 5pm they are done. It's time to live your life. Yet for some reason we as a working society frown on this notion. To be truthful I think they have it right.
There are many European cultures that DO NOT speak of work outside of work. They understand the idea of a balanced lifestyle. They do their hours in the office then they come home and live their lives. In other words they work to live - they do not live to work. Why does this seem to be a fantasy in our North American culture?
I know some of the arguments in favour of longer hours will revolve around commerce and 'the machine' but did you ever stop to wonder who benefits? And just how much MONEY does that machine need to make. We live in a society that sees the opportunity for the slice of the pie. We want it all and we want it bigger and bigger and bigger. We seem so focused on MORE we have lost sight of BETTER.
We talk about quality of life in this country but we really have no idea what it means. Quality of life isn't how big your SUV is or how beautiful home is. Quality of life is how your life is lived. It is the time you spend with people who love you and care about you. It is appreciating what you have as apposed to coveting what you don't. It's about the life you are sharing both yours with others and others with you.
So the next time you watch a movie try to imagine yourself in the leading role. Try to imagine what you would choose to do in that moment of crisis. What if you get fired tomorrow. What if you lose everything in the stock market. What if you have nothing but the clothes on your back. It's in this moment that we realize it's the relationships with others that sustains us. THEY give us the strength to move forward. For regardless of what tragedy is on the horizon for your leading lady, the people you love will be there to throw you a rope and pull you through.
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